I have not seen this topic broached before but it needs to be discussed and hammered constantly by those who care about kids and horses. Much is written about girls and horses. I agree with just about everything that I have read on that subject but for suggestions that competition in horse shows is somehow good for little girls.
I think that it is even more important that little boys learn to work horses and ride.
To put it simply, what institutions in our society teach boys to become good fathers and husbands? In the past boy's who had solid fathers, or other male relatives close to them had simple models to imitate. Of course, there have always been boys who did not have such models, but the numbers are higher now than they have ever been.
Our youth sports system has completely failed boys without solid men in their lives. When I was a kid everyone had a chance to be on a team, be a part of that team and to be influenced by the coach. Today we have incorporated the youth sports model that we so loathed in the early seventies. We were appalled that the East Germans and other Soviet block countries took talented kids and had them spending hours practicing each day and even sending them off to camps where they practiced even harder.
We do the same for our best young athletes. As bad as that is for the kid, it has worst ramifications for the kid that is not as talented but loves the game. He knows that he can never reach the "travel team" or "all star" level which has become the goal of modern youth sports programs.
So he stays home, becomes heavier, weaker, sicker and has a lot of time on his hands to play video games. He replaces the cigarette smoker as society's greatest future health care cost.
A smaller percentage of boys are raised in rural areas than has ever been true in our nation's history. Urbanization and suburbanization has had the side effect of more boys being raised without pets than we ever have had.
The vast majority of boy's in our culture grow up having never nurtured anything. They have not even cared for a puppy. Add that to a lack of solid role models and it is easy to see why parenting in America is at such a low ebb.
Being a father is not instinctual. It must be learned. That means that it must taught.
Natural horsemanship teaches boys how to properly use,and demonstrate affection. They learn how to properly use control and to set boundaries for the horse. They learn confidence in their ability to do something more significant than running up a good score on a computer game. They learn to be gentle. They learn that there is a time to be firm. They get exercise in the sunlight. It does not matter if they are great natural athletes.
They learn to love.
They learn to nurture. Let that sink in. They learn to nurture. Now ask yourself how one can be a good father without being a nurturing person.
Not enough people understand the importance of the reason that we practice natural horsemanship. It is not just to make better horses. It is to make better people
It's never too late. I am a much better person than I was before I became immersed in natural horsemanship. I have much less anger. My voice now is rarely raised but for the times that I yell out to a kid that he is doing a good job. I have learned to put the needs of others ahead of my self interest.
Do you want your little boy to grow up to be a good father to your grandchildren and a good husband to your daughter in law?
Then put him on a horse.
( I think that this is a vital topic. If you agree please share this post with friends and family and get it out in all the ways that a computer allows us to do.)
2 comments:
Absolutely true. This is the single most important post in this blog to date, and I have read all of them.
When I was a kid, I wanted to play sports...soccer, baseball, golf, track...but I was the skinny uncoordinated kid..could not build and keep muscle mass...but was not allowed onto any of the school teams..could not get through the try outs...hence my sometimes bitter distaste for team sports..
I grew up in the desert southwest, where rodeo is more religion than sport, many boys still develop through rodeo...not enough, but quite a few..it sure will make you tough.
I do so wish that every boy had the opportunity to participate in a program like ours at Mill Swamp...I can think of no better way to grow up..the answer is not to go back to the "good old days" but to grow and learn, and make the days of our future the "good new days." One can never go back. We are growing a bumper crop of wimps...passive and unchanneled, the energy of youth poured out to poison the ground like a bottle of flat soda pop. Come on out, learn how to channel your inner being, to calm the tempest of uncertainty, to dive headlong into life without fear, to tilt at life's windmills with zest and vigor. If you can gentle a horse through focus and calm thought, train him and then ride him through 25, 50, a hundred miles of pitch black forest and cutover swamp, then you can accomplish anything. What are you boys waiting for? Pick up that saddle and rope and get to it! Win, lose, or draw a tie...the only sin is not to try! -Lloyd
Shared on the Karma Farms page on Facebook. Thanks, Steve!
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