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Monday, December 29, 2008

My Brother's Keeper





For several years the first person to get on the wild horses that I had was my little brother Patrick (Lido). One day when he was about 10 he mounted five horses that had never been mounted and only got bucked off of one of them. During one of my clinics with a particularly rough BLM mare who gave me great difficulty in saddling, I heard a voice coming out of the audience as I explained that I would not be mounting her for the clinic. "Um ah bolunteer," Lido called out.

Lido's speech was as labored as much of his movement. He was born with cerebral palsy and his speech was severely impacted by the malady. It was not as impacted as his body. His right arm was nearly worthless to him. He ran, ran hard, trained hard and worked hard. He built a rock hard, lean body with more strength in his left side that most teens had in their entire bodies.

He struggled, he worked, and this morning he died. He died in a hunting accident and did not suffer for a moment. He died doing what he loved best.

My house has been full today. It has been filled with grief and my riders and their families. No happy ending to this story. I am so glad that I can count on my friends and my riders and my wonderful wife.

2 comments:

The Stevensons said...

I was just going to write a post, but seeing as Steve already has done it, I'll comment on it so his post can be at the top of his blog for a while.

I just wanted to thank all of Steve's riders and their families for being there for Steve today. You are his favorite people. You are what he looks forward to when he's at work. He loves the weekends because of his horses and because of you. Being there today meant the world to him. What can one say and what can one do when something tragic like this happens? Not much, truly, but your presence at his home showed him you care and that you support him and I know that means so much to him. He really needed that today.

We have something special at Mill Swamp. Kind of like a family - if you're not a part of it, I'm truly sorry. You have no idea what you're missing. I'm thankful for it - for the riders, for the horses that teach us more and more about ourselves each day (if we choose to open our eyes enough to see), and for Steve - who cares about people and horses with more unintentional altruism then I have ever seen in a person before.

If you are a part of Mill Swamp - I challenge you to take a step back and see how blessed you are to be here. See what many things you have learned. Learning never stops. You are never to old to see something in a new and beautiful way.

Thank you Steve, for everything you do. We support you and are here for you.

-Rebecca.

Anonymous said...

Lido, You will be missed dear friend.....For those who don't know me at Mill Swamp, I am Debbie Proctor, Sarah Daugherty's mom. I am in Tennessee right now and just heard of Lido's passing through the tear-filled phone conversation with my daughter. I wanted to reach out to Steve & Rebecca and the Mill Swamp family and let them know I am there in Spirit.

It was only last week I had teased Lido at Food Lion about the holidays. He teased me right back as was his way. Perhaps it was his vigor or spirit or his wild stories but there was something undeniable about Lido that drew you too him. One couldn't help but love him. He reminded me of a character in a Dickens novel.

He was even supportive to me as a mom about my special needs child Rebecca. In fact, he would bug me "to get her out riding more". Lido always had a word for me when our paths would cross at school, Food Lion or Mill Swamp. I can't tell you how often he'd call to make small talk with Sarah and end up talking and letting me know what I should do for my special daughter, Becca.

Like Lido's family, I too found it easy to see Lido's "abilities" rather than his 'disability'. To Lido, his disability was just natural. It simply was. As a mother, and an advocate for special needs, I always loved and admired his spirit for that. I shall miss watching his special 'horse poetry in motion' when he was on a horse.

Even as I write this text, I shed tears, though knowing Lido's in a better place. Lido's absence from Mill Swamp and our community will be greatly missed but fortunately for all of us, his spirit will live in all of us. We are all so much richer for having "Lido" in our lives even if it was for such a short time.

Goodbye dear one. May God rest you and keep you well.

Love,
Sarah & Rebecca Daugherty, Debbie, Fred & Benjamin Proctor, Roger & Isabella Ash