Sunday, June 7, 2015

The Death Of Your Horse

I have no understanding of grief,or,more particularly, the process of grieving. Most cultures develop various rituals to aid the living in dealing with death. In that regard, I know that my own feelings are not instructive. I cannot think of a single ritual, sacred or secular that gives me any more comfort than would putting on a straight jacket. I realize that there are very few who feel this way and it is good that there are so few. Death rituals are one of the most important building blocks of social cohesiveness.

Yesterday Kelly taught the kids, and several adults, tribal wisdom regarding death. She did so by directing a ceremony where I buried Red Feather Thursday. I am so glad that she has the knowledge to do such things. This is another aspect of being the educational institution that we strive so hard to be.

Theodore Roosevelt dealt with the death of his young wife by never again mentioning her name and struggling to keep her out of his mind. On the surface this might seem cold and uncaring but I am not in a position to judge what he had to overcome simply in order to continue to exist.

What I am certain of is that there is no emotional pain greater than that of loss. I do not know how to control it. Perhaps the cold,simple recognition of reality before the loss occurs is helpful in reducing the impact of a loss. When entering into a relationship with anyone, human or animal it is good to keep in mind that since the beginning of time every single relationship has ended either by death, desertion, or forced separation.

And this relationship will not break that mold.

Horses die. People do too.

People also simply leave.

Such things happen.

And when they do, it is best to remember that you still have work to do and it is time to get up and go get that work done.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You're right Steve
No matter what you have to keep on keeping on! As hard as it is, over time the memories of whoever is gone, help to get thru it. Our animals with their relatively short lives are to me the hardest - even knowing that with them at least, we will find another to fill the empty spot - NOT to replace them - none of my animals is or will be replaceable. I'm not too great at the immediate grieving part, but I like the idea of the Rainbow Bridge. If that exists - there will be a really large group waiting to greet me - at least I prefer to believe that!